Levitate Above

My back is killing me from leaning in.  What can I say?  My hearing isn’t what it used to be…

If you know me, you know I have something to add to all the discussion and debate lately about “Leaning In” and “Why Women Still Can’t Have It All.”

First off, big shout out to the women of the C-Suite:  Melissa, Meg, Sheryl, and my own boss, Margery, etc., etc. (the list is not as long as it should be).  Here’s to your Mt. Everest accomplishments and burning desire to change the world for the women warriors of the work force. We need more of you and more of us doing what you do. 

But, to be honest, if I had to navigate today’s knowledge worker economy, I’d be in real trouble.  Few middle-class kids can afford the unpaid, high-powered internships which are the price of entry for grads today – and where many young pros meet their first real mentors.

I think more middle-income women have an experience a bit closer to mine-- and boy were my “internships” unimpressive (waitress at Porky’s Clam Bar, anyone?).  By the way, most big companies don’t give out entry-level positions for being a really terrific mother’s helper; although that’s probably a more telling marker for future success in business than you might think.

As I reflect on my coming of age during the bloom of 70s Feminism, which arguably changed our country and the world more than most events or social movements of the last century, and consider the pros and cons of all arguments around today’s feminism or lack thereof, I guess I’m a bit ambivalent. This is a tough economy, these are tough issues, and women who need and want to work are really struggling to build careers of meaning and substance.

Here’s my ah-ha moment for the day, however:  The secret sauce for success, in my opinion – the thing that makes it possible for the largest percentage of working women to progress in today’s hugely competitive environment -- is the ability to “levitate above.” 

Because that’s what most women in the real world have to do. We have to consciously fight the gravity field weighted down by forces of the “dark side” and float above it: fear, performance anxiety, politics, prejudice, more privileged peers, pay inequality, family responsibilities, economic distress, age, physical limitations, boredom…stop me before I sound like a socialist.

We have to be detached enough to not take it personally and focus on the work so that we perform that work with pride and commitment and gratitude for the opportunity and the paycheck. 

To levitate above is to make the pragmatic choice.  It may not get you in the C- Suite with the tech titans, but it can feed a family of four and present unexpected opportunities for those who are willing to trust their own instincts, talents and perseverance.  It can force you to detach enough to think bigger, be more innovative, and just perhaps, explore challenging opportunities of your own making.

In a happy coincidence, David Brooks and I seem to be leaning – or levitating – in the same direction today.  In his New York Times column, he argues for the value of “detached” writing about politics and policy.  Couldn’t agree more!  He too believes that detachment better affords the more lasting impact -- to plant the seed and creatively explore underlying concepts and realities surrounding an idea. Ultimately more fun, that. 

Three cheers for those who have the intelligence, energy, youth, connections and fierce ambition to do the “leaning in.” Again, we need you.  But I think I’ll hang with the gals who seek to levitate above.  I can learn more up there.