Fleeting Thoughts

It’s been a hectic week or so for Mrs. Sedd with business travel, my detox diet, issues involving my very infirm parents and upcoming travels weighing heavily on my time and attention.  That said, I did want to report on several things:

1.      For those of us lucky enough to have one, spouses are a really good thing.  They love you unconditionally, comfort you completely, and occasionally even drive the carpool for you.

2.     Colleagues are among life’s many blessings. While walking to an appointment in Chicago yesterday, a colleague from our New York office started to tell the tale of leaving her wedding ring in a hotel – and the word “ring” made me look at my hands and notice, holy crap, I left mine on the bed of my "just-checked-out-of" hotel.  I ran back to the hotel, grabbed the concierge and recovered my rings before they were lost to me forever.  I gave a $20 tip to the tiptop concierge who really deserved more.  As for my colleague, it’s drinks at the place of your choice when next you’re in D.C.!

3.      13 is a pretty awesome year for my girl.  She is lovely, funny and terribly, terribly sweet.  I'm so lucky to have her in my life.

4.       My 28-day detox has been a life changer.  Hooray for my green juice in the morning!  Hooray for my non-gluten energy level!  Hooray for my ability to get through the day without caffeine! And for all you cattle out there?  I realize now that I never much liked you.  [But I still love cheese, however.  And butter.  And ice cream.  Sigh. All things in moderation.] When I get back from the land of drinks with umbrellas in them, I will recommit to most of my new dietary ways. 

See ya.

Advertising Age-ism

Have you noticed that virtually all prime time television advertising – except  for spots about erectile dysfunction or bladder control or some other “old age-y” pharmaceutical product – features women and men under the age of 40-45 pretty much exclusively??

I was glued to the TV last night watching American Idol and couldn’t help but notice there was NO ONE of roughly my age in any of the commercials airing during the show.   This is a surprise when you consider that media critics (and probably more than a few FOX network execs) have grumbled about the viewing audience for Idol “skewing older” in recent years.

But here’s another reason to be surprised:  Who has most of the household wealth in this country today?  Boomers, you betcha.   And most boomers are like me, I suspect, creeping up to or just past the 6-0 mark but feeling 2-2 most days. And they are just vain and self-interested ernough to want someone to market cool stuff to them, e.g., they're not dead yet. 

Boomers like pretty clothes at Macy’s “One Day Sale!” too, but you’ll never see them in that store’s TV advertising.  They also diet and like to take the “Special-K Challenge” -- but there's a 35 year-old "oo-lala" chick in the TV commercial.   They love sleek looking cars, even though it seems only glamorous 20-something models in gowns drive them.  At least in the Jaquar spots currently airing on TV, British actor  Ben Kingsley --  a man who has certainly passed the 6-0 mark, if not the 7-0 mark – has a starring role.  (But then again, everyone knows that the British are among the more highly evolved of our species, except for those who play soccer, perhaps.  Wait, I take that back, for 2 reasons:   David Beckham. And my lovely niece’s lovely husband who I believe does play soccer from time to time.)

Anyway, to get back to my larger point:  I am calling out the Big Brands and their millennial and Gen Y advertising consultants for their insensitive Ad Age-ism. It’s time we see more 50, 60 and 70-something women (and men) who are fit and attractive and fashionably dressed shilling on TV for something other than Depends or Boniva or Viagra. 

So I say to them all:  Life is full of surprises and a few serious certainties.  One of them is age.  You too will get older and perhaps resent, a least a little, the indifference of advertisers to your mature allure. 

Until then. 

In Search of the Perfect Summer Camp

Last summer, my daughter attended her first “sleep away” camp for a week, and she loved it. This year, after intensive lobbying on her part to NOT go to summer school for the first time in 5 years, I’m looking at additional camp options and wow – camping sure has changed!

My daughter’s  summer camp last year was a terrific YMCA facility just east of Virginia Beach on the Virginia Tidewater – about a 3.5 hour drive from where we live – and it had pretty much everything:  water sports, pools,  large playgrounds for team athletics, hiking.  The cabins were roomy and very clean with significant distance separating boys’ cabins from the girls’ quarters.  Enthusiastic, fresh-faced teenaged camp counselors rounded out this typical camp experience.

Unfortunately, my daughter doesn’t want to attend that camp for more than a week this year – so I have to find other camps that might provide the right kind of “growth” experience for a 13-year-old girl.

A colleague of mine came to the rescue with suggestions…and now I want to go to camp!

There are really wonderful adventure and leadership camps that feature domestic and international travel in small groups – some focused on physical fitness, other programs focused on community service, still others focused on language emersion, history or writing.  And even though they cost roughly what my annual college tuition did in 1975, I suspect they are worth every penny.  Who wouldn’t want to attend Spanish Middle School  -- in Spain! -- or take a 2-week bike trip on Cape Cod and surrounding islands like Nantucket.  Or  participate in a community service project in Taos and Santa Fe in New Mexico.

Cool.  What wonderful memories to be made!  What interesting new friendships to be had!

I figured my daughter would be excited by these kinds of “camping” opportunities to be considered – not the least of them being a solid 2-3 weeks away from her parents while being part of a team of teens experiencing new things together.  Boy, was I wrong.

“Mom, I hate bike riding.  And I don't want to go to camp to learn Spanish.  You can’t make me go to a camp I don’t want to go to.  I don’t want you to sign me up for anything yet.”

I frowned, and my husband chimed in, “She has a test tomorrow." (I know, because I read the first 6 chapters of The Adventures of Tom Sawyer  -- which I actually enjoyed re-reading -- to get her ready for it!)  "Can’t we stay focused on that?  We have a lot of time yet before we have to worry about camp” – not true, actually -- “and when’s dinner?”

Deflated, I reassured my daughter that I wouldn’t consider booking a camp stay without her advice and consent.  Certainly, this makes the challenge of filling up 10 weeks of summer vacation with activities fairly significant.

Maybe I’ll go to Costa Rica and get a little community service time under my belt – that is, when I’m not drinking Strawberry Daquiris and getting a little sun after a lovely swim in the Pacific Ocean.  Maybe I should just let my husband and daughter figure out this summer thing on their own.

Maybe I should…try again, tomorrow. 

1600

1600 -- How that number could put fear in the heart of any aspiring college-bound student when I was in high school.  For that reason and one or two others, I was interested in the news about the latest “facelift” for the much-maligned (and deservedly so) SAT exam.

When I was a sophomore in high school, my PSAT results clearly indicated that a combined 1600 on the SAT – two perfect 800 test scores for the Verbal (what they used to call the English and Writing exam) and Math (they still call it math…some things never change!) exams – was not in the cards for me.

If you’re a figure skater or gymnast, getting a perfect score seems like an arbitrary matter of circumstance, skill and the judging panel's personal taste;  the inclusion of the essay portion of the SAT a few years back smacked a bit of that, too. 
[By the way, later in life, I met a few “perfect scorers” in my travels and was always surprised to hear they had hit the double-800 jackpot; frankly, they didn’t seem so "rocket science smart" to me.]

While I’m not that familiar with the ACT, it’s about time that the SAT's required essay and ridiculously esoteric vocabulary exam are going the way of the dinosaur. 

Thinking back to my youth, and considering the college application process through the lens of parenthood now, the larger question remains:   Are standardized tests the right metric for evaluating college readiness? 

I know, I know, I know:  Any guidance counselor or admissions director will tell you that it’s just “one” factor considered for admission to college.  But SATs and ACTs still seem to carry more weight in the admissions process than they should, which is problematic not only for economically disadvantaged kids trying to get into college but also for the growing population of kids with ADHD and other learning disorders for whom standardized (and regular, for that matter) test-taking is a real challenge.  Despite the fact that a growing number of colleges don’t require either test for consideration, they still remain a pillar of the process at most of our country’s best institutions of higher learning.

I believe in the pursuit of excellence and the measurement of accomplishment.  However, I wish our highly competitive and meritocratic culture could more readily recognize and reward the value of seeking to achieve one’s personal best, whatever that may be.  I wish creativity and enthusiasm -- in classwork, after school or voluntary activities -- carried more influence than they presently do for college consideration.  And I wish that parents, teachers and institutions alike were more creative and innovative about the whole notion of what comprises an education today, marrying students' classwork more closely to the things they're passionate about -- and yes, you can still learn math and grammar and writing and critical thinking with that kind of approach.  (Ok, you may not be able to name all 50 states off the top of your head, but then again, few can).

And finally, instead of complaining about not getting an A on a science exam, for example, I’d love my daughter to say to me, “Mom, I did my absolute best today on my science test.  I got a B!” – and be truly thrilled about it. 

In my humble opinion, that’s a truer measure of a student’s accomplishment at school – and in life, for that matter.

 

White Out

Ok, that’s it.  I’m officially over snow.

While I’ve enjoyed a few extra days away from the office this winter, as anyone would,  enough already.  I’m really tired of that cooped-up, it's snowing heavily and I can't go anywhere feeling.  Then there's the concern about doing a 180 on the road if you hit ice, or getting stuck in a snowdrift, or stepping outside your front door and falling on black ice…stuff that could (1) kill you (2) seriously injure you or (3) confine you to bed or the chair in your family room for an indefinite period.

Nononononono!

And then there's that little thing called work.  I’ve tried to work from home but I’ve had intermittent problems with our wireless (working very sloow-ly) or our office server, making it hard to be responsive.  But let's face it:  it’s just not the same as being in the office.  Yes, we’re all about the “virtual office” these days and the flexibility and other benefits associated with telework…but it’s just not as effective as popping into someone’s office for an answer to your question or their's.

I’m also worried, too, that my daughter has fallen out love with school in favor of breakfast and texting in bed, a late shower, and maybe a Netflix movie and a pizza in the afternoon.  Of course, she is a teenager now, so that explains things, I suppose.  Can’t blame languorous teenage behavior on snow.

And then there’s my wonderful husband who is feeling just a wee bit testy as well – too much family togetherness, I guess, this weekend and not enough alone time.

I get it.  Me too.  Not enough alone time.

Tomorrow is another day and I’m sure (if there is school), we’ll have a 2 hour delay in the morning, which means late to work and the problems that presents (like 9am conference calls you can’t do, etc., etc.).  Sigh.

BUT:  When feeling housebound, there are always things one can do to press the “reset” button on your mood.  Read a book.  Try a recipe.  Take a nap.

Today, I suspect I’ll do all three. as I try to remember that spring is coming. Someday.

P.S.  If you like snow and you like Scandinavian thrillers, try Smilla’s Sense of Snow (not the movie, which is silly, but the book – which is also silly but so well written you forgive the author his turn into ridiculousness in the final 3^rd of the book).

Time to make a snowman.